'Twas the night before Christmas and all through the house,
Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse.
The stockings were no longer hung and the gifts were all packed,
You see all were leaving for Ohio, with munchies in a sack.
We take two cars and drive quite separately.
The old folks leave early but travel more hesitantly.
Grandma and Grandpa take bets on the drive,
As to when the kids'll pass and our conjunction arrive.
Breakfast occured when we hit I44,
We all hoped for light traffic driving this corridor.
Somewhere in the middle of the Show Me state,
We changed the driver and took a lil' break.
And Ma behind the wheel, and I in Cowboy hat,
Had just settled back for a long winter's nap.
When all of a sudden, there rose such a clatter.
I yelled at the wife, "What is now the matter?"
The Jeep was a purring as any engine could,
But the speed it was making didn't match what it should.
What is happening, what could it be.
The car is slowing like a hesitant bee.
The car was running, the RPM made it clear,
But trucks were quickly approaching the rear.
"What did you do?" was my errant plea.
"Nothing,"she exclaimed, "as you can plainly see."
When what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But a exit in front of us, drawing up near.
With a driver like Connie, so lively and sober,
I knew in a moment she needed to pull over.
The sun on the pavement shone like new fallen snow
And dust bunnies danced in front with a glow.
Much slower than turtles, the Jeep kept crawling,
As we inched towards the top, the speed kept falling.
To the top of the ramp, to the top of the hill,
Now please don't stop, we need to clear it still.
The car came to stop as it crested the ramp,
The engine still ran, but move forward it can't.
Throw it in park, I screamed with dismay,
Maybe that will make it OK.
As the shifter was moved to the big letter P,
No change occurred that we could see.
"Now put it in Drive, and see what that will do
Perhaps it will move, but I haven't a clue.
But with multiple shifts, and to no avail,
The car wouldn't move like an old rusty nail.
So turn it off and then give it a go,
Do you think it will help if I use my big toe?
No engine malfunction or indication too.
No lights to foretell a problem anew.
This time when the shifter landed on D
The sound ca-clunk was heard clearly.
Move forward I screamed, in the next lot,
And we'll see when we get there, just what we've now got.
The car now moved and accelerated too,
It did not hesitate and my confidence grew.
I know it is Christmas and all shops are closed,
But make a beeline home, and that's what I proposed.
More rapid than eagles his coursers they came,
As St Nick whistled and called them by name.
But if we were going to make it back,
We needed to outfly his reindeer and sack.
So up to the cities my Jeep's horses they flew,
With a car full of gifts and Grandparent's too.
And heard it exclaimed as we drove into sight,
Merry Christmas to all and to all Good Night.
